What 40 for 40 actually looks like for me

Forty kilograms. Fortieth birthday. That's where the name 40 for 40 comes from. My fortieth birthday is on 21 July 2028, and I've set myself the goal of losing 40 kg before then. Ambitious? Absolutely. A reason to panic and start eating boiled chicken seven days a week? Absolutely bloody not. I've done this before. I've lost more than 60 kg through diet and exercise, and at one point I was training five days a week. I know what serious commitment looks like.

I also know that life doesn't stop because you've made a spreadsheet and bought some yoghurt. So this time, I'm trying to build something that works in the life I actually have.

Food that doesn't make me miserable

Let's begin with the important stuff. I love food. I love cooking it, experimenting with flavours, finding new recipes and making a meal feel like something worth sitting down for. Garlic? Yes. Parmesan? Obviously. A beautiful sauce? Don't threaten me with a good time. I have absolutely no interest in spending the next couple of years eating food I don't enjoy. Instead, I'm focusing on making the meals I already love work better for my goals.

That means looking at portions, choosing ingredients thoughtfully and making sure there's enough protein and vegetables on the plate. It doesn't mean pretending that pasta, potatoes or bread have personally offended me. I cook for Shane and Owen too, so our dinners need to work for the whole family. They're not particularly enthusiastic about spicy food. I, on the other hand, believe a little chilli can improve almost anything. The solution is usually quite simple. Cook a lovely family dinner, then add the heat to my own portion.

No need to turn the kitchen into a restaurant with three separate menus.

What a normal day can look like

Breakfast might be overnight oats with yoghurt, berries and protein powder. Or sourdough with cottage cheese, jalapeños and a little cheese. Lunch depends on the day and what's happening in the kitchen. Dinner is where I enjoy getting creative. Chicken bowls, pork fillet, cottage pie, orzo, stir-fries, braais and proper comforting meals all have a place. I also like having snacks available rather than reaching the end of the day wondering why I've eaten practically nothing.

I'm not presenting this as a rigid meal plan that I follow perfectly every day. It's the kind of food I'm building my routine around. The actual recipes, with ingredients and serving sizes, are going into the Recipes section.

I'm not declaring war on restaurants

Shane and I enjoy going out for dinner. And when a restaurant gets something right, I want to enjoy it. A gorgeous plate of prawns drenched in garlic? Yes, please. A crème brûlée worth talking about afterwards? Also yes. One meal doesn't tell the whole story of how someone eats. I'm learning to look at the bigger picture rather than treating every restaurant visit as some sort of dramatic moral event. Food is nutrition, but it's also pleasure, culture, celebration and connection. I don't want to forget that.

What about exercise?

In 2023, I was in the gym five days a week. I loved seeing what I could do when I put the work in. But I'm not going to write a fictional workout schedule here and pretend I'm already following it. What I do know is that movement matters to me, and I want to rebuild my relationship with it. Not because exercise is punishment for eating. Because I remember what it felt like to become stronger and more capable. I want more of that feeling in my life.

Tracking the actual picture

There's a Progress page on this website for my weigh-ins. Not just the pretty ones. The whole point is to document what happens, rather than produce a suspiciously perfect graph that only moves in one direction. I already know that the scale can jump around. I've experienced the frustration of seeing a higher number after a meal out, even when I haven't done anything remotely capable of explaining that change in body fat. Water retention, sodium, digestion and ordinary fluctuations can all influence a weigh-in.

That doesn't make the feeling any less annoying. But it does mean one reading needs context. I want to look at patterns over time rather than let one morning decide how I feel about an entire week.

My rules this time

I'm keeping the important ones straightforward.

• I want food I actually enjoy.
• I'm not cooking three completely different family dinners.
• Protein, portions and balance matter.
• Restaurant meals and celebrations are allowed to exist.
• One difficult day doesn't cancel the work I've already done.
• Progress should be documented honestly, including the messy bits.
• I'm not going to pretend I have all the answers.

And here's another important one. I am not a coach. I'm not here to tell you what you should weigh, what you should eat or how quickly your body should change. I'm sharing what I'm doing, what I'm learning and what happens along the way. Your situation may be completely different.

The deadline is a goal, not a verdict

Twenty-one July 2028. That's the date I'm working towards. I'd love to reach my goal by then. But I also know that life can be unpredictable, and that a date on the calendar doesn't have the final say on my worth or the value of the work I've done. The goal gives me something to aim for. The habits are what I need to live with. And the story will be whatever actually happens. So that's 40 for 40. Real food. Real life. Actual progress.

Probably quite a lot of garlic. And a woman who's starting again with considerably more experience than she had the first time.